Carrying the torch for freedom

Not until Darth Vader popularized the calming effects of deep breathing was better use made of the non-speaking sound track. Up until that moment, the best breathers were Jacques Cousteau and his faithful companion Albert Falco. Lloyd Bridges, as Mike Nelson, in Sea Hunt, came close, but his voice-overs were in Californian, while Jacques narrated the breathing in a nicely accented French, interspersed among long underwater moments of sswiiffff-nik-rubblerubblerubble-sswiiffff-nik …

That’s how it would have sounded the other day, under the flat belly of the Swedish-Norwegian-Greek ship in Piraeus Harbor. I wonder whether it would have happened at night. Darkness is helpful when a couple of pals are out for a swim in a busy harbor, but the cutting torch throws quite a glow.

It takes a few minutes to cut through a propeller shaft, even when you have the very best Broco Tactical Exothermic cutting rods (burning in excess of 10,000 degrees — “Fahrenheit” of course, because they’re made in Rancho Cucamonga, California, down the road from the beach where Mike Nelson used to dive). They would have used the Broco Military and Tactical Breaching Torch Kit PC/TACMOD1, because it’s … well it’s just so good. It’s ultra-lightweight (it doesn’t matter what that is in pounds), and designed for “man-carried operation” above or under the surface.

Now, if you were casting this scene, you’d want to use a blond woman to act the man who carries the torch — she’d have a profile in a rubber suit and her eyes would just yearn for freedom. And that’s what it’s all about, isn’t it? Freedom!

Freedom from all of that legal stuff that, otherwise, would land you in court for cutting someone’s propeller shaft. Freedom from the international laws of the sea that tell you to leave civilians alone unless they commit a crime. Freedom to be the tough cop who adjusts her sunglasses and pulls out her weapon. Then kills all the bad people who are not you.

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